By Joy Naomi

It’s common during the holidays to open our hearts and minds to the less fortunate, but many people forget that those in need don’t stop being in need once the calendar turns over – or that they don’t want to be there in the first place. In this issue, Joy Naomi invites us to accompany her as she visits with those who are often out of sight, out of mind, and out of luck.

Numerous people have asked me about my trips to New York to work with the homeless, as well as women and children who have left their home country, so I decided to just write it all down. This isn’t to get praise or anything – it’s nothing more than to answer questions all at one time – so with that being said, read on, and I hope you enjoy!

The very first time I ever set foot in New York City was for vacation, but it was with a tour group. You know the kind – the ones that are all, “To your right there is blah blah; now to your left is yadda yadda,” so it wasn’t like I actually got to go exploring. Boy, did that show when I went back many years later!

The first year I went specifically to work with the homeless was in 2014. Other than the tour, I had no clue how to get around New York at all. Needless to say, I got lost quite a bit! It was also up to me to find a place to stay, eat, and means of getting around. Let me tell you, it was rough for this little country girl in the city! At any rate, I finally found a place that would rent me an apartment for the week. I eventually learned the subway system, too, and that was an adventure all on its own. After getting settled in, I got started on what I went there to do.

The first place I went was to Central Park, where for the next three days, I handed out food and water to the homeless. It’s something I’ll never forget. While there, I heard a lot of interesting stories. The one thing that seemed to be a running theme was that people didn’t want to be homeless. Homelessness is one of those things where people are quick to say “Oh, they’re just drug addicts. If they wanted a job or a place to live, they would kick the habit and get it,” or, “They just got lazy and didn’t want to go to work. They deserve it.” Out of the twenty people I talked to that day more than half of them said they had good jobs at one point – some of them were even working on Wall Street – but the economy basically took a shit and they got fired and lost it all. It was all downhill for them after that. They lost their jobs, their homes, and some even lost their families.

One man who really stands out in my mind was a veteran who fought in Vietnam. As we sat there talking, he told me that things were all right when he first got back from the war, but they soon started to take a turn for the worst. He suffers from PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and because of that, he lost everything. He never got the help he needed for it because he couldn’t afford it and nobody would help him. He lost his family due to the flashbacks – he thought he was still in the warzone and would attack his family without realizing it was them. His wife felt that she and their children weren’t safe there, so she left him. He agreed that they weren’t safe with him, but at the same time, he didn’t want them to leave. He hasn’t seen his wife or his two children since. After that, he just gave up. He couldn’t hold a job because of the depression. Soon he fell behind on payments and ended up on the streets. This man who fought for our country, who put his life on the line every day and came back a broken man, was now living on the streets begging for food on a daily basis because he couldn’t get the help he needed. To this day, I can’t stop thinking about him.

For the rest of the week, I volunteered at a place that helps women and children who have fled their home country. Each had a different story to tell. Some ran from the government, some ran from abusive husbands, and some just wanted a better life. Whatever the reason, they all had one thing in common: When they got here, they barely knew English and didn’t have any money or anywhere to stay. The organization that I worked with takes these women in and teaches them English, as well as life and job skills, so they can start over. While I was there, I did everything from looking after children to teaching English (I know; me teaching English to people is kind of funny because God knows I can’t speak it right half the time!).

One of the women I worked with told me that she came here with her two children and only $30 to her name. She chose to leave her country because her husband was abusive, both mentally and physically, to her and her kids, and the police wouldn’t do anything about it because where she was from, it was a normal thing due to the view of women as subservient to men. After getting here, she found the program and was able to learn English and get a job; however, her husband tracked her down to try and make her come back home. She didn’t tell me how he was stopped or what happened after that, but that was a few years prior to our meeting and she was still here, safe and happy.

I really enjoyed my time in New York. I was able to go back the following year and do all of it again, and I hope not only to go back a third time, but maybe even make it a yearly thing. The biggest thing I took from this experience is to not judge someone for how they are, whether it be homelessness, refugee status, or even just how they look. We all have our own story to tell and our own reasons for how we are today. They’re our stories and our reasons, and nobody deserves to be judged for that.